How to Romance a Slavic Woman
Romances between Slavic women and men from America, Europe, and Australia happen more often these days than 50 years ago.
Why romances with Slavic women were rare until 1990s
The main reason that made love connections with Slavic women possible was the drop of the Iron Curtain, which occurred in 1987 with the advent of Perestroika in the USSR.
Further push to international affairs was given by the fall of the Berlin Wall in 1989 followed by the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991, after which the formerly closed Slavic countries and their women became open to contacts.
The intricacies of Slavic culture
Because Slavic countries used to be closed to the western culture for generations, the male-female dynamics there were developing in their own ways, dissimilar to what western countries got accustomed to.
Interestingly enough, gender equality was enforced in Slavic countries by law and developed to the levels more advanced than in the western world at that time. In Russia, women’s equality was pushed by Bolsheviks since 1918. Other Slavic countries such as Bulgaria or Poland joined the drive after the end of the World War II in 1945, when they became a part of the alliances led by the USSR.
While housewives of 1950 were reading magazines teaching them how to please a husband, Soviet women were empowered to work on par with men in any industry. Moreover, they were pushed to the forefront of industrialization, whether they wanted it or not.
Because of this constant pressure to be equal to men for generations, Slavic women of today view compulsory equality with men a part of communistic oppression. At the same time, they view the old-fashioned courtship and being treated by a man like a lady (not a “Tovarishch”) as a sign of newfound freedom.
This is why romancing a Slavic woman has to be different to how you would court a western girl.
10 tips to romance a Slavic woman
If you are dating a lady from Russia, Ukraine, Belarus or other Eastern European countries, you will get the best results by being a perfect gentleman.
Men are expected to lead in relations in general but when you are dating a girl from Eastern Europe, your drive as a leader is expected to be even stronger. Make plans and take charge, and let your lady take a passenger seat.
2. Compliment her
Ladies from Russia or Ukraine need more compliments from guys. Complimenting her looks and efforts to look beautiful is acceptable, moreover, expected.
3. Give flowers
Flowers are an effectual part of the courting ritual. Bringing flowers to the first date signifies respect for Eastern European women.
4. Pick the check
There is no going Dutch in this part of the world during dating. If you ask her to pay for herself, not only you will still have to pay the bill, but also you’ll never see this lady again. (A local guy would be furious if a girl offered to pay for herself; he would think she doesn’t see him as a real man and thinks he has no money.) Accept this quirk as the local cultural phenomenon. Besides, prices in Russian, Ukrainian restaurants are way cheaper than your local dating.
5. Avoid early intimacy
Any push for early intimacy is viewed by Slavic females as your ambivalence, i.e. “not being serious” about her. If you abstain from trying to get physical (including kissing on the cheek or hand-holding) for at least the first eight dates, then you have a much better chance of securing her affection in the long term.
6. Offer little “signs of attention”
So called “signs of attention” include small presents (boxed chocolates, small jewellery items, etc.) as well as non-material acts of service, such as opening doors, moving chairs, or offering your hand when she gets out of the car. If you watch any Hollywood movie from 1950s, you will see males behaving this way towards females. This is exactly what a Slavic woman expects from a man she is willing to give her heart to.
7. Be her “rock”
Gentle feminine women tend to be emotional at times, and this could present a challenge to an unprepared man. Be her “rock” that is reliable and strong, no matter what. If she seems to be upset for no reason, it’s no reason to be upset for you. Remember, you are the “rock”. You just stay strong and confident, supportive and helpful, and she will get over her sudden emotions quickly. But if you become upset or angry, then you are not the “rock” and she cannot rely on you, which could make her think you are not the right man for her.
8. Plan your move
If you have been dating for some time and it’s over date #8, she is expecting you to make your strong interest in her known. If you want her to be yours, it has to become physical, unless you have already discussed it and you both agree on no sex before marriage (such views are now in vogue in Russia). However, most likely, this is not what your woman wants, unless she strongly supports this view.
You may need to raise this topic with her casually, as if you have come across it via a magazine or TV show. Ask what women of her background think about it. (Usually she will tell you her own view, as the outlook of all females of her country; it’s typical for people to assume that most other individuals support a similar idea.)
The ideal setting for the first intimate contact could be a trip away together. Your cooking a romantic dinner, complete with scented candles and good champagne, would also work very well. It would be great if it’s some kind of anniversary (one month of acquaintance, two weeks since you first met, etc.). Red roses and charming music of her favourite singer will complete the setup.
Intimacy signifies a new level of a relationship for Slavic women. She will now see you as a couple, a girlfriend and a boyfriend. Normally in Slavic culture people don’t discuss “where this relationship is going” or “are we officially dating”. Physical intimacy is the commitment a woman gives to the man she loves and wants to be with.
9. Keep courting your lady
Males of her own culture habitually stop courtship after achieving the new level of commitment, which includes becoming intimate. This makes women upset and disheartened, and it’s another incentive for ladies to make it harder for a guy to “get her”. To prove you still value her, keep the courting behaviours she got used from your side, and she will realize that she can really trust you.
10. Meet the parents
If this is something you see as working in the long run, once you are confident in the future of your relationship, it’s time to meet the parents, even if it’s via Skype (in case her or your parents live somewhere else). Meeting the parents will cement your position as a steady couple in love.